teen parenting presumption #1

Two of my kids are now in the "adult" category....18 and 20....I feel like I've successfully "parented" them up to this point.

Then why, oh why, do I forget the simple presumptions in parenting of teenagers?
This morning I was reminded of one of them and I still get that shocked...."oh! that's not true" response....and then I take a minute to remember....I am the parent of a teenager!.....truth to a teenage comes from a totally different slant.

Am I confusing you? I feel like I am. What I'm trying to say is according to my teens, EVERYTHING is my fault. It doesn't matter if I'm not within a 10 mile radius, never even had any idea of what was happening....It's still my fault!

My dad and step mom, Ann are visiting this week and they graciously volunteered to go where no sane person would go....Mac's room. They decided that they would like to help her organize and arrange her room. See, as her mother, and a slightly compulsive organizer (just slightly), I have attempted this feat before (multiple times, actually) and just may loose my mind if I try again.....it's so sad when you give up hope for your offspring in an area you hold close to your heart...

My dad is going to build Mac some shelves to hold all her lovely shoes, but Mac is very specific in her design idea of these shelves. So today a trip is planned to Lowe's. My dad hasn't parented a teen for many years and I think he may have forgot that they tend to sleep in just a tad. He's been up since the crack of early.....waiting....and waiting....and waiting.

10:00 am and I can see he's going stir crazy....I go in a "stir" Mac.
Let's just say that scenes from the "Exorcists" come to mind....her head spun around....there was an evil look on her face....and the voice that came out of my sweet baby telling me to get out was
deep and scary.
Ok I'm exaggerating....but she was not happy.

10:30 am my dad announces that he's gonna get her out of bed....Ann and I start begging "please don't do it!" "it's not a good idea" "we can go later and work on it tomorrow".....he didn't even acknowledge us as he went upstairs.....I wanted to hide under the kitchen table.

I listened for screaming and crashing furniture or doors slamming or projectile vomiting but didn't hear anything. My dad comes down smiling. "What did she say?" I ask. "She said "ok she'd get up" he says. I'm shocked. "how did you do it?" He smiles and says " I told her it was 12 o'clock and time to go to Lowe's"

Mac comes down stairs 2 minutes later and if you think she was scary while trying to wake her....let me tell you....the look she gave me when she came around that corner sent shivers up my spine. "What?" I ask (this is where I forgot parenting presumption #1) "It's not 12! It's only 10:30!" she hissed. "Tonight I'm coming in your room at 2 am and telling you it 8am and time to get up" she continued. "I told him not to do it" I plead...."didn't I, Ann...tell her" Ann starts trying to defend me.....it does no good.....the evil look continues. Then I surrender and remember....it's not gonna do any good. Just let it go....no amount of arguing will help......someday they will have she owns teens and that gives me a small feeling of vindication.