A holiday ode to my kids

Twas about a week after Christmas

and all through the house

the hubby and I awake in bed

laying there as quiet as a mouse

We were silently appreciating

our house full of discord

we knew it would soon be over

and all would be bored

Our teen and adult age children

and all of their friends

filling our home with chaos

we wished would never end

Slamming doors, laughing voices

stomping feet on the stairs

smells of 2am pizzas cooking

carelessly filling the air

Night after night of sleep interrupted

waking to a house in disorder

A grocery bill that makes your wallet cringe

and a laundry pile like no other

But all these things I cherish

there's no need to pretend

I realize my children will be grown soon and gone

my only wish is that these times would never end

A Time To Sing Again

I have finally given in.

After years of complaining (my husband and kids), insults (my teens), and embarrassing moments (the list is way to long),

I broke down and scheduled surgery to have my hearing fixed.

I have mentioned my hearing loss in past posts.

I usually talk about the benefits of being deaf in one ear and having a mild to moderate hearing loss in the other.

~not having to wear ear plugs to bed anymore to block out the Hubby's snoring.

~not hearing the trains or loud teens or puppy's ringing bells in the middle of the night.

~the wonderful excuse to use on my teens "I never agreed to that! I must not have heard you correctly!"

When I was diagnosed with Otosclerosis in my mid 20's it didn't really bother me.

I was just having trouble hearing what some people were saying (I thought everyone had suddenly taken up mumbling just to annoy me).

Over the years it has slowly progressed.

I remember asking my ENT doctor how I would know when I was ready for surgery.

He said "You won't but you're family will let you know. Your hearing loss will drive them crazy."

Such wise words.

If I can judge correctly, I'd say my family has been ready for at least 5 years.

But I'm just chicken.

My solution?

Just don't go to the doctor anymore.

See what I mean about chicken?

But there comes a time when it all adds up and you get tired of it.

Tired of not feeling included in conversations.

Tired of your kids rolling their eyes every time they have to repeat what they say two or three times.

Tired of always having to consider where you sit in a lecture or where you stand in a group of people.

Tired of putting a smile on your face when you have no idea what someone just said and in your mind you are going through all the possible things you can say instead of "what?" or "pardon" or "sorry, I didn't hear you" (it gets really old).

I guess what I'm saying is the bad is finally outweighing the good.

There are things that have also "snuck up" on me, you could say.

Things that had changed over time that I didn't really notice.

A big one is being able to hear my own voice.

It's difficult to explain (and I could be explaining it completely wrong) but I think it is because I can no longer hear my voice through my ears effectively so mostly, I hear myself in my head (no, I'm not hearing voices in my head-I know what you're thinking).

I guess the best way to put it is, that I don't sound like myself.

I think that is why I have slowly stopped singing.

I used to love to sing.

In choirs, in church, in the car while listening to the radio.

But I feel like I don't trust what I sound like

and what I do hear, I don't like.

I will be having my stapes bone removed and a prosthetic device implanted on December 1st.

And the first thing I look forward to doing is singing again.

How can it be?

Tony has gone and grown up.
In the span of 30 minutes.
Seriously!


He left the house today my baby
and came home a young man.


All due to a haircut.
Well, not really.

Sure, he's had plenty of haircuts before,
but I think there's this magically age
(usually around 8th or 9th grade)
where one day you look at your child
and suddenly you see a young adult.

With my 4th baby it just seemed to happen with the removal of about 5 pounds of hair.

I clearly remember the day I noticed Nae had changed over night.
It was the summer before her 8th grade year.
We were sitting in an auditorium for 8th grade orientation.
I looked over at her and thought "Holy cow! I see a woman!"
And I couldn't take my eyes off her.

And she noticed.

"Why do you keep staring at me?!!" she whispered.
"I'm not." I said nonchalantly and turned and tried to focus on the lady speaking.
That lasted all of 2 seconds and I was staring again.

"Will you stop?!!" she hissed.
"What?" I tried to pretend I was looking at something else that just happened to be over her shoulder.

She didn't buy it.
Mostly because I kept gawking.

But hey, I went through 38 hours of labor!
I figure I'm entitled to a little gawking.

Can I have an 'amen' ?!

Anyhoo, of course, I'd love to prove my point by sharing "before and after" pictures of Tony.
And of course, being the teen that he is, he refused to let me take a picture.

I could go up and take one of him sleeping....

Please note that I am showing great restraint right now.
Yep, I'm a good mom.

how The Hubby and I met

The Hubby and I are celebrating our anniversary today.

We've been married 20 years.

In honor of our anniversary, I thought it might be fun to tell you the story of how we met.

Plus, I'm not a real mushy person (meaning no love poems here).

This seems more my style.

Our story begins the fall of my junior year in high school. That was the year my sister, Alex, left our home in Holland, Michigan and to move in with my dad and step mom in Kalamazoo (about an hour away).

One Friday evening I arrived in Kalamazoo for a regular weekend visit. My step mom was busy making dinner and asked if I could go pick up Alex. She told me Alex was over at Matt's house.

Matt was Alex's new boyfriend who I had never met.

I didn't bother writing down the directions or his address. It seemed pretty simple and figured I could remember.

I pulled into Matt's driveway. The garage door was open so I walked into the garage and knocked on the back door.

I waited a minute or so and then I knocked again, a little harder this time. I could hear music blaring on the other side of the door and I figured they must not be able to hear me. After another minute and still no answer, I knocked again, a little louder this time. Waited some more, no answer, so I banged my fist on the door as loud as I could.

Before I can finish knocking the door flies open and simultaneously the guy opening it yells impatiently "WHAT?!!!"

Oh, this is where I should mention that he is soaking wet with nothing but a hand towel clutched around his waist.

For a very long second I'm standing there, my fist still in the knocking position. The only thing that moved was my jaw dropping open.

I quickly put my arm down (and close my mouth) and try to remember what I'm there for.

I blush, stammer a couple incoherent words and then ask if Matt is home.

Naked Hand Towel Guy is blushing too.

All over I notice.

Naked Hand Towel Hot Guy tells me I have the wrong house. That Matt lives across the street and a couple houses down.

Now I'm feeling really stupid.

Naked Hand Towel Hot Guy With Really Nice Legs must be able to tell how uncomfortable I am.

He starts rambling.

He tells me how he is good friends with Matt.

How he thought the knocking was Matt messing with him.

I start rambling too.

Telling him who I am.

That my sister is dating Matt.

Where I'm from.

My social security number.

Naked Hand Towel Hot Guy With Really Nice Legs And The Most Beautiful Eyes I've Ever Seen makes some more small talk and then points me in the direction of Matt's house.

And I leave.

A little dazed and confused.

We ended up running into each other again later that night.

It turns out Naked Hand Towel Hot Guy With Really Nice Legs And The Most Beautiful Eyes I've Ever Seen Plus Really Great Hair has a girlfriend.

She must have heard the story of our meeting.

I was guessing by the way she glared at me.

But that didn't stop Future Hubby* and I from becoming friends.

*I will call him this now because if I continued to add all the other adjectives for his appealing characteristics as I got to know him better to "Naked Hand Towel Guy"...well, we could be here forever.

And he turned out to be a wonderful friend.

Over the next couple of years we had a lot of fun hanging out. He was always there to make sure I was doing okay.

He showed up at the hospital when Nae was born and I was all alone.

If I heard a motorcycle pull up outside the little apartment Nae and I lived in, I knew it was him stopping by to see how we were doing.

he sold this to pay for my engagement ring. that's when I figured out he must really like me

When my sister, Alex passed away he listened to all the endless talk I did about her and comforted me when I cried.

We started dating not long after that. It only took 3 years after that awkward meeting in his garage.

Hubby says he can still remember what I was wearing that day (he IS the ultimate "detail guy").

And for once, I can say the same.

It was a towel.

A green one.

Or maybe it was blue?

21 years ago today...

Today is the anniversary of my sisters death.

I'm thinking about her a lot today.

I have some new readers since I wrote this post in October so I thought I would just re-post it.

My sister Alex <--click there

Have a good weekend everyone!

Christmas "firsts" and "lasts"

We are having a wonderful Christmas here and I hope you are too.

Each year I think "this is my favorite stage of my kids lives" but then the next year I am surprised at how much I love the next stage.

I never thought I'd love the teen years. But I can honestly say that I really do.

The way they interact with each other (most of the time) is really fun to watch. We spend so much time laughing.

I'm not sure if having our oldest off at college has made us all appreciate "family time" even more or if it has something to do with the move to a different state, but the kids are close and seem to support each other and enjoy spending time together. Don't get me wrong, they still have their moments but the good ones outweigh the bad ones and those are the times I choose to focus on.

This Christmas as I sat back and watched my kids, I realized that this year there were a lot of "firsts" and "lasts" in our home. I thought I would see if I could write some of them out.

a first: having my children's "significant others" (ie. boy/girl friends) at our home during the holidays.

a last: having our kids all to ourselves....Nae spent part of Christmas day with her boyfriends family (which is also a "first" too) I guess I have to share right?

a first: my kids are finally enjoying family game time (in the past I always had to force them to play, now they actually ask to play).

a last: I think this may be the last Christmas that Tony runs around the house jumping up and down continually on Christmas Eve saying "Tomorrow is Christmas! Tomorrow is Christmas!" all of the other kids seem to have outgrown the "childish excitement" for Christmas....which is sad.

searching for the Christmas Pickle....it helps to tell them ahead of time that the prize is a gift card this year....

a first: Not having "what I want for Christmas" lists ten miles long from each kid. This year Mac's list was "a curling iron" and Buds list was "a DVD". Not fun to work with, especially when there are grandparents wanting ideas too.

I should mention that Tony only had one item on his list this year too....

a first: We will be meeting the parents of Nae's boyfriend today. Makes me feel old, but she is a senior in college so I guess these things have to happen soon or later.

a first: Having my girls help me in the kitchen (and not having to beg) and enjoying cooking together.

my girls....

Have a wonderful rest of the holiday season everyone!

our one thanksgiving tradition

My kids love holiday traditions.
They actually get really mad if I forget one.

And it's actually gotten worse since they've gotten older.

Or maybe it's that they are teens and they are just

better at communicating what a loser I am if I forget one.

We only have one Thanksgiving tradition

and I wanted to share it with you.

Our Thanksgiving table cloth.

I realize that you will see some of the real names of my kids

but it wouldn't be the same if I photoshoped their names out

or tried to change the pictures

and I don't really have the computer skills to do that...

it's just a white table cloth but each year everyone

has to write something they are thankful for on it.

sometimes the kids traced their hands.

which I loved.

sometimes I giggled at what they are thankful for

at least mom and dad are included with the gameboy.

and there's record of what they loved that year.

or some sweet things...

this one is during my oldest daughters first year of college.

Some record big life changes....

this is from the year we got transferred back to our home town.

and some record things we will never be able to forget...

this was after 9/11.

Whenever anyone is with us for Thanksgiving they have to write on it too.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

protecting the not so innocent

As you will see, I finally got around to changing the names of the kids and Hubby on my blog.

I've gone through most of my old posts and fixed them, but I'm sure I missed some here and there. I also edited pics and hometown stuff to try and keep it general.

Picking names was hard. I kept saying "that name doesn't fit" but then just decided -"well of course it doesn't!" and I just went ahead and did it.

I started out by taking a form of their middle names (per suggestion of one of my readers) but that got a little complicated and one was pretty insistent on what his name should be. One I used a nick name (you can try and figure it out it shouldn't be that difficult).

Hope it doesn't seem to weird for everyone. It sure does to me!

Let me formally introduce you to the "not so innocent" members of my family....

first there is "The Hubby" (I know SO creative!) or sometimes referred to as the "Hubs" or the "Dear Hubby". I realized when looking for a picture of him that I don't have many. So I chose this one. He is starting my cute little rototiller that he bought just for me to use in my garden many years ago. What could be more sexy...a man with a gardening tool! Oh yeah!

then there is "Nae". She is 21 and a senior in college.

here is "Bud". He is 18 and a senior in high school.

this is "Mac" she is 15 and a sophomore in high school.

And last, but not least, "Tony". He is 14 and an eighth grader.

Thanks for stopping by! Have a great day!