shopping with hormones

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I went to the grocery store yesterday to finished up my Thanksgiving dinner shopping.

I tried to plan ahead. I really did. But planning ahead is not one of my strengths.

I did my "big" shopping last Friday afternoon. I thought that I would get everything I needed and then just pop in and pick up some of the fresh stuff I didn't want to buy so far ahead of time. You know, lettuce and fruit and stuff.

But over the weekend I started realizing there were other things that I didn't realize I was low on. All big, heavy things like kitty litter, puppy food, and cat food. Hubby also asked me to buy some pop "cubes" to restock his work fridge.

The reason I'm pointing out all these heavy items is because we all know what it's like when you have a heavily loaded shopping cart and how hard it is to try maneuver it through the store isles. Then add 20 million other people who are poor-plan-aheaders like me; a bunch of insane mothers with at least 2 or 3 young children who all need naps but instead decided to bring them to the store; a few dozen old people who can hardly walk' pushing carts instead of their walkers as they shuffle along slower than a crippled snail; and my hormones.

Yep, my hormones played a big part in this shopping trip. I've decided that has got to be what is wrong with me, because I wanted to rip every one's head off at that store.

It's a good thing I wasn't carrying a loaded weapon.

I'm thinking that people should have to get a grocery shopping license just like a drivers license.

It's obvious that people need to be taught the proper way to grocery shop.

Just like anything in life, there are some rules of etiquette even for grocery shopping.

For example, the person with a bigger cart always has the right away (have you ever tried to steer one of those double-child-carrying-double-long-cart jobs?). And if the shopping carts are equal in size, the person with the largest load of items should always be yielded to. When my cart is over flowing and heavy (like yesterday) and I'm struggling to keep my momentum going and someone with one those half cart steps out in front of me, I'm tempted to pick up the speed and run them right over (and scream and "yeeha" while I do it).

And how frustrating it is when someone abandons their shopping cart in the middle of an isle to go to another area to grab something or compare prices? When I see people doing that, I like to to add a few items to their shopping cart. Let them explain to the check out lady that they really didn't want those condoms and hemorrhoid cream and aren't sure how they got in their shopping cart.

I appreciate the fact that when all these "older" men retire they want to help their wives out at the grocery store, but they are the worst of them all. They have no idea what they are doing. They block entire isle while they compare the fiber content of different brands. They walk slow, with their eyes on the shelves, banging into people, cutting others off- basically having no clue that others are in the store shopping too. At my Meijer back home "senior day" was on Tuesday and I avoided that place on that day like the plague! Yesterday they were out in full force (maybe "senior day" is Tuesdays here too hmmmm).

By the time I was weaving my way to the check out lane I felt like my blood pressure was at blow-the-top-of-my-head-off levels. Like a giant spring was twisting in my chest and ready to snap from being wound so tight. I wanted to scream, not at anyone in particular-just scream.

One solution that would be helpful, besides the grocery shopping license, is if you don't have at least 10+ years of grocery store shopping experience then you are not allowed in the store within three days of a major holiday.

And passing lanes in all isle of the store. And blinkers on shopping carts. And maybe some Valium handed out at the door. And maybe a little better planning ahead....

communicating with your teen 101

Well hello!

Feels kinda weird not blogging for a couple days. I really missed it. I hope you all had a great holiday weekend. I sure did!

We had a great time visiting friends back "home". It was a sweet, quiet, free from teenage drama kind a weekend.

Probably due to the fact that my kids were spread all over southwest Michigan most of the time.

And most of communicating was done by texting.

I can't tell you how much I love texting my teenagers!

Every parent should go out and sign up for texting the minute their kid turns 13.

When I am texting with my kids they are almost magically nicer people. I never have to say "don't you take that tone with me!" or "look at me when I'm talking to you" or "don't you roll your eyes at me!". I can just choose to believe that they are behaving like normal human beings while I am talking to them.

So lovely!

I am thinking that we should adopt a "texting only" week at our house. I'm sure you can figure out the week I'm talking about. Just think about how nice it would be when the female hormones are flying if we just kept our mouths shut for one week and "let our fingers do the talkin"!

It would save us from having conversations like this one that Mac and I had a couple of months ago. This was after she said something that hurt my feelings (probably that her whites weren't white enough or that I didn't put enough peanut butter on her sandwich--yeah I know, I tend to get a little "touchy").

Me: "I'm hormonal this week Mac! Do you think that you could just for ONE week be nice to me so I don't get all upset?!"

Mac: "OMGosh MOTHER!!!! Why do you always have to point out that you're hormonal? Do you think that I can't figure it out on my own?! Everyone in this house knows you're hormonal! If you point it out one more time I might have to kill myself!!!!"

Me: "If you know that then why can't you just refrain for one single week from being insulting to me?! Tell you what. I will buy you a notebook and you can write down all the insulting things you want to say to me for that week and then when the week is over you can say them all to me!"

Mac: *rolling her eyes* "You are so lame!" *stomps out of the room*

I don't know. I thought it was a pretty good solution.

Just image if we only texted that week. The peace, the quiet, the money we will save on Kleenex.

Mac and I did have some great "real" conversations this weekend. We went out for lunch one day together. Here's my favorite part.

Me: "...we all went out for dinner on Saturday night. We went to Fricano's. They have the best pizza ever! If I was on death row and was requesting my last meal, it would be Fricano's."

Mac: "wow! That must be good, but I think we need to establish why you would be on death row."

the phone rings and it's my hubby. He pulls one of those "I can't find something and even though you are hundreds of miles away from home because you are the mother/wife you should know supernaturally exactly where it is". I HATE that! Then he gets an attitude when I can't tell him where it is. Like I lost it or something!

So I hang up the phone.

Me: "I would be on death row for murder....you dad, of course" I shrug my shoulders and take another bite of my sandwich.

Mac: "Wow Mom....that is inappropriate on sooo many levels."

Me: Shrugging my shoulders again. "what would you have for your last meal?"

Yes texting is great.

But these conversations are the memories that I will cherish!

enjoying the sweet little things

It's so nice to have your kid home that you only get to see a handful of times a year. I've learned to really savor and cherish these moments. The time went so fast with my oldest that I didn't truly appreciate it.


You know how it is when it's your oldest. You can't wait to see them accomplish that next feat....their first words....the first steps....tying their shoe....kindergarten....reading....writing....riding a bike....sleepovers....sports....getting their drivers licence....dating....college acceptance....high school graduation....moving into the dorms....wait!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~ The day of Nae's first steps....I actually missed the first ones....I was in class. ~~~~~~~~~~~
It was somewhere in high school, maybe around the applying to colleges, that I figured out it was all going too fast. Life was a whirlwind during that time (4 kids, all with their different activities and teams, me working full time). Suddenly, I realized that she would be going off to college as a 17 y/o (why did I let her start kindergarten when she was 4? I could have kept her home and she would have been fine and I would get another year of my child's life!!!). I just wanted everything to slow down. I wanted a "redo" so I could appreciate things more.

Having Nae come home is a little like having a celebrity in the house....at least for the first few hours....her little brothers and sister all think she's better than string cheese....then that wears off and the normal quarreling starts again. Which is nice in a "I'd only appreciate the bickering because I'm feeling all sentimental and drippy" kinda way....then I go to my quiet place. ~~~~~~~~~Nae helping with Tony's first bath at the hospital~~~~~~~~~~~~

And it's been fun watching the kids interact with each other. I loved seeing the kids hug her when she first got here and how happy they were to see her. And sitting in the living room listening to them talk and joke with each other. Last night, I'm not sure how it happened, but we all ended up piled in dear Hubby and my bed. Nae was exhausted from her last couple of days of travel and laid there while Mad played with the little ringlets on the back of Nae's neck. We talked about how all the kids would climb into bed with us after a bad dream or during a storm. How Nae would stand right next to my face and not say a word but I would somehow feel her presence and wake from a deep sleep (and almost scream cuz it would freak me out!). Bud always did it to dear Hubby. We would wake in the morning with kids snuggled between us. Things I never appreciated at the time. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~Nae reading to Bud~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's these silly little things that I'm cherishing right now because I know that it will only be a couple of weeks and she'll be off again and we will all be missing her. And I realize Bud will be leaving next. And cuz I'm all hormonal....
my sister, Alex, holding Nae....Alex died in a car accident 8 months after this pic was taken

Don't you forget about me....

I've been doing a lot of reminiscing lately about high school...

Maybe it's facebook and catching up with all these people that I haven't been in contact with in over 20 years.

Maybe it's because of my 40th birthday is looming right around the corner....can you say midlife crisis?

Maybe it's because my kids are at an age that I remember so well....and that is frightening in it's self.

Then I heard that John Hughes died this week. Talk about getting all nostalgic.
For better or worse John Hughes' movies shaped my teenage years.

He wrote and directed movies like Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Pretty in Pink, and many others. In the 80's these movies that were written from a teenagers point of view were pretty right on (well, maybe not Ferris Bueller's Day Off--that one was a little out there). Each movie a little bit of something that we could all relate to.

In Sixteen Candles I could relate to the character Samantha. Feeling awkward (didn't we all when we were teens?). Feeling misunderstood by my family and sometimes completely ignored (how I longed for a Brady Bunch moment when I would go to my room upset and my parents would come in and we could talk it out and have a happy ending in 30 minutes).Or the unrequited crush on the guy who didn't even know you existed. I even had an eerily similar incident as Sam when my grandmother "assessed" my "development" and discuss it loudly in front of all the extended family at Thanksgiving....oh! the horror! Of course Hughes movies had things that were over the top....like the exchange student Long Duk Dong....or the geek, Ted, being trapped in the coffee table all night. But that's part of what made them so fun to watch.

I didn't really care for the movie Pretty in Pink. I was crazy in love with Andrew McCarthy and hated his character in the movie. I actually rooted through out the movie for the main character Andie to end up with the geek Dukie Dale. He was head over heels in love with her the whole movie and so sweet, then gives her up at the end. Yuck. But the movie did a pretty good job showing how our friends and peers influence the choices we make.

The Breakfast Club, with a group of kids from different cliques in Saturday detention, taught us that we all have our insecurities and not so perfect home lives and how we all just want to fit in. That there is always more going on than what people see on the outside. It was all taught with humor, outrageous scenes and good music (or at least I thought so at the time).

Of course a lot of Hughes' movies were just plain silly, like Vacation, Home Alone, Weird Science, and Uncle Buck. I didn't realize all the movies he had either written or produced until I googled him after he died.

Too bad he's not around to make some coming-of-age movies for my up coming midlife crisis.

How about a movie about a 40ish mom who can't sleep because of her hormones going crazy? Or the trials and tribulations of dealing with multiple teenagers...there could be a lot of humor behind that. The struggles with wrinkles and gravity. Fading eyesight and memory. There could be a scene with some cool music going on when she has one of her hot flashes?

I'm sure more funny movies would have come from him if he hadn't died so young. Thanks Mr. Hughes for all the 80's memories and laughs.

rainbows and kittens...i swear!

Good morning!!!! Thanks for checking in today.....

Have I told you that I think you're wonderful?
I'm not trying to suck up....really....I think you are!
Have a great day! Here's rainbow that was in my backyard yesterday!



I thought I'd give you something sweet and lovely to look at.....cuz this morning I just want to complain......just for a minute.....I promise.

Ughhhh! I can't sleep!

Blast! this getting old stuff!

I got about 3 hours last night.....!

The worst part is I have a big night planned tonight.....taking the train into the city with a girlfriend....lots of exploring....food....a show....more food....planning on closing the place down....well at least staying as late as the last Metra.

And I'm exhausted already.....

Every night it's the same thing.

I crawl into bed dog tired, tuckered out, outta gas, bushed, spent.....you get the idea....and then I lay there....wide awake for at least an hour.

Then I wake up in the middle of the night because of something.....may be a train....or one of my cats jumping on my head....or Hubby's dream where he is falling and suddenly jerks awake (Dog gone it! I hate that!...then he falls immediately back to sleep while I lay there!)....

And I lay there.....and I lay there....and it takes me over an hour to fall asleep again!

I've tried all sorts of things.

relaxation techniques.....sitting in the hot tub.....reading.....not reading....emptying my mind (ha! that's a good one for someone with ADD!) ....drugs.....

Nothing works.

So I've just resigned myself to this is the way it is....for however long....

Thanks for listening.....here's a cute kitty picture (I don't have any puppy pictures)

Ahhhh....look how cute he is sleeping (I'm just a little jealous)......

Have a super terrific day!