More facebook talk

a little pic of the Wrigley building in Chicago (because I like architecture almost as much as flowers)

I've blogged about facebook before (click here if you want to read it).

And how my kids harass me about how I use it.

Today, I'm not feeling much blogger creativity so I thought I'd show you a little evidence of some of that harassment.

I fully admit that I facebook stalk my kids. They know it, it's part of the agreement we made when they signed up for it. Mom and Dad get full access or you get nada.

I also fully admit that I steal pics of them out of their albums and then repost them on my site.

It's my right as a mother.

They spent 9 months in my womb (yes, I will also admit, I'm almost looking for reasons to say womb now- just to torment Mac) and 20+ hours of labor on each and countless other humiliating things related to the birthing process.

It's my right as a mother.

So a couple weeks ago, I decided that it had been a while since I posted pics of the kids so I spent some time perusing their albums for something I liked. Of course my girls (or their friends) each post about 12 thousand pictures every couple of weeks so finding nice ones of them is easy. The two boys are a little more difficult and I ended up adding some from my own stock.

All and all, I think it ended up being a nice little album. I titled it "facebook stalking my kids #2".

The next morning I find this comment on my album from one of my offspring (again, I won't name names):

mother i dont know how you dont get the facebook photos concept.. let me explain..1. make an album in yourcase you could sum all of this into "im a creepfest" 2. add photos**important** two weeks later you think hmm i want to add more pictures to my facebook you DO NOT create a new album!! you just go to "im a creepfest" edit and add photos! then youre not a loser who has 43 thousand albums of 15 photos!! do you understand?!

Have I mentioned lately that I love my teens?

But I had some lovely friends who happened to give me some facebook love and support.

Awesome Wendy had this to say~

I personally prefer the multiple photo albums, then I don't have to search through photos. I can skip right to "fb stalking my kids." But then, I'm a loser too.

And the Very Hip Vicky added this~

Loser here too, love, love,love your mom's way!

There ya go. We facebook mom's need to stick together.

Since I'm on the subject of facebook. I have spent a little bit of time looking at some of the other kids facebook walls that I'm friends with- not in a stalkerish kinda way, I assure you. Looking to see if what my kids say is true about how we use it. I looked at kids that range from teens to twenties. The biggest difference I see in our facebook usage besides the photo album thingie is how they don't comment on each others posts.

I think that is a little sad. I would think it would feel like your talking to yourself and no one cares (kinda like blogging and no one comments-*hint*hint*).

Maybe they don't care if anyone is listening. Maybe it's just a generation thing.

no privacy ever

*Warning* to my male reader and young readers: you might just want to skip this post...I didn't mean to talk about topics such as childbirth and breast feeding but I just started rambling (something I never usually do...) and it just kinda turned into that. Just so ya know. You've been warned.

Not too long ago, I was happily sitting at my computer at the kitchen table.
I was on facebook chatting with an old friend that I haven't talked since high school.


One of my kids (I won't name names) comes up from behind me and starts reading over my shoulder.


"Excuse me!" I shout as I clumsily try to cover up my conversation with my hands and body.


"Geez Mom! What are you trying to hide?" says my offspring.


And then I feel guilty.


Yeah guilty. Not because I was saying anything that I shouldn't be saying or talking to someone that I shouldn't be talking to. I actually felt guilty because I just wanted some privacy!


Obviously, I would never be allowed to read over my teens shoulder without a few choice words from them. Because well, that's just....well....duh!!!


But heaven forbid Mom should get any privacy!


Putting the two words "privacy" and "mom" in the same sentence doesn't even feel right. Because I'm a Mom then my world is all "self sacrifice" and laid out for the offspring to rummage through.

I've been a mom for 21 years now and I starting thinking back on the loss of my privacy.

Of course it all begins in the womb (Goodbye Mac, I said the "w" word she's outta here!) The privacy issue isn't so big here. Wait I take that back! Suddenly thoughts of my OB/GYN office and the lovely table with the stirrups came rushing back. (I was originally thinking that it's more about sacrifice for your kids at this stage-eating right, giving up the coffee and diet coke, etc. etc., but you're still losing your privacy and your kids are the cause.) So, yeah there's no more privacy at that point....time to start getting used to it.


Then childbirth. A whole new level of exposing yourself. I remember thinking while pregnant with my first (remember, I was just a young teen thing then) "is there any other way we can get this thing out? Eewww! Gag me with a spoon!" (it was the 80's after all...actually, I never said that. Actually, I don't think anyone ever said that in the 80's except that one movie with a hairy Nicholas Cage at the beach--I can't remember the name of it....).


Anywho, I really could have cared less about privacy once the "urge to push" came. And I'd like to have a word with whatever male doctor came up with that phrase. It's obviously a male who never gave birth because it is not an "urge" it's more like a "I have to push now or I'm gonna rip that lovely nurses head off that's standing next to me who is telling me to 'breath through it' and then I'm gonna kill my husband next for doing this to me" kinda feeling.


Then there's breast feeding. That's when your privacy is not only violated by just a few choice nurses (who are "expert breast feeders" which means that gives them the right to gab your "breast feeding equipment" in her cold hands (without warning or permission) to show you how to get the baby to "latch on"). With breast feeding your privacy can also be given up in front of visiting family, friends, and strange people at the park depending on how good you are at keeping that little blanket in place and slapping hands off the women who think it's okay to pull back the blanket and "sneak a peek".



Then, when the offspring start getting around on their own you lose bathroom privacy....I'm definitely pretty reserved and I managed to shut the door (sometimes) but I still count fingers sticking under the door and your kid yelling "I can hear you peeing Mom!" lack of privacy.



I'm also counting the fact that there were years that I didn't enjoyed anything sweet or indulgent all by lonesome when in the presence of my kids as a lack of privacy (idk maybe that's stretching it). Although now that they are older and I spend more time away from them it isn't as big as an issue but I still go to drink my diet Coke and find Mac has stolen it or I find myself wolfing down my dessert so no one else can "share" mine.

I'm on the upswing of regaining my privacy. But there are still days when I feel like I will never have it back completely. Like with the computer chatting issue. Oh yeah, and the other day when the kids found my old high school yearbook (the reason I had it out had nothing to do with facebook and not remembering people I went to high school with....I was just reminiscing....really!). My kids proceeded to look at and make fun of pictures of me. And one of them started reading what people wrote in my yearbook! If I tried to read my kids yearbooks I would be verbally assaulted for sure!

And of course, when they are all grown and gone, I will miss them and I will have an abundance of privacy. But for now. Back off please.

seems like just yesterday....

My oldest child is turning 21 today.

Time has flown by.

Seems like just yesterday....

you would wake me up giggling in your sleep,


and....

you could charm the pants off your family without even trying.

It seems like just yesterday.....

you would spend hours sitting quietly in your high chair playing or coloring
so that your mom could study for nursing school.

But....

sometimes microbiology was just too exciting.

It seems like just yesterday....

I worried about your fashion sense


And....

we thought we would never grow those bangs out.

It seems like just yesterday.....

we cheered when you lost a tooth.

And....

when you graduated from kindergarten.


It seems like just yesterday.....

you and Ben King duked it out over spelling bees and math competitions,

and......

you showed your competitive spirit in every area of your life.

It seems like just yesterday....

we marveled at how you seemed to change into a beautiful woman over night.

And...

amazingly more beautiful on the inside.

Today.....

We continue to look forward to watching you take on the world

and watching you try new and fun things

and we look forward....

to seeing how God will use you and your gifts to serve Him.

We love you Nae! Happy Birthday!

preparing for puppy

We are in full puppy preparation mode here.

5 days till our lives will be turned upside down.

I've been studying my puppy training books that I brought home from the library.

We went and spent a small fortune at the pet store on all possible puppy needs.

Tony is busy setting up the puppy's cage with close supervision by Kitty.

Kitty, yeah that's his name.

I'm sure we'll be a little more creative with the puppy's name.

Poor Kitty. He has no idea what he's in for.

Tony has been busy cleaning his room and setting up the cage so the puppy can sleep with him.

Kitty usually sleeps with him.

This is what I found this morning when I woke up.

Oh dear, look who thinks he has a new cage.

Poor Kitty.....

Brotherly Love

Watching one of your kids get their heart broken is painful.

Painful is too small a word.

I read a quote yesterday on Pam's blog. I love her blog. She works in a library (as you know, libraries are my favorite place to be) and she reviews books, along with some other great stuff. I now have a list of books I look for when I go to the library that Pam recommended.

Anywho, back to the quote it says, "Children can be happy when their parents are miserable. But a parent is never happier than her unhappiest child." (Laura Lipman, What the Dead Know, posted 2/23/09)

That is so true. And I will tell you from experience that a mother witnessing her child in pain will feel that same pain tenfold.

That's why I keep telling my daughters "boys suck~let's throw rocks at them."

Not date them.

But they don't listen.

And it's the same for my boys. I keep telling them "stay away from girls they're nothing but trouble!"

But it's like talking to a brick wall (a hormone infested brick wall-but a brick wall none the less).

I know they have to grow up at some point and learn their own life lessons but it doesn't make it any less painful to watch.

Mac had a blow to the heart a couple days ago. It was the evening that I was at Tony's soccer game. The Hubs was out of town too.

So it was just poor Bud here to comfort his little sis.

While she sobbed he tried to help.

He turned down the lights. He turned off the TV.

He offered to go get her chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream from the store.

He offered to make her a batch of cookies.

He offered to go beat up the boy....

He left her alone to cry for a while.

He's a pretty good brother if you ask me.

an all new level of insanity

Last evening I got a call from Beth, she's one of the other moms from Tonys soccer team.

Tony's team had an away soccer game and Beth and I had exchanged some e-mails about carpooling.

Beth said something that literally bothered me all evening.

She said "you never e-mailed me back"

Not a big deal ehhh? It was huge for me.

Because I was sure that I did. When she said that my mind started chugging (you could actually hear the squeaking of gears trying to turn). I quickly tried to remember if I did e-mail her or not. I could have swore I did. I could even picture it in my mind.

Beth and I don't know each other that well yet, but I do know this about her....she's a lot more organized than I am (well, pretty much everyone is) so I immediately thought "Wow! She's probably right".

"Really?" I said. "Well, just so you know, I did e-mail you in my mind."

Yes. I actually said that.

No wonder I don't have any friends here.

I'm an idiot.

So the rest of the evening was spent obsessing over this. Do you realize how dangerous this could be? Me forgetting things is already a HUGE cause of strife in our family. It drives everyone (including the kids) crazy. And it's something that no matter what I do, I can't seem to control. I've tried everything so don't bother sending me notes like "get a day planner" or "put it in your phone". I've tried all those things and more. Sometimes I think I might have something really wrong with my brain.

But I'm already falling apart in other areas of my body that the Hubby can see....at least this is inside my head. I'm not gonna admit to something hidden in my head.

Anywho, what if, not only do I forget to do things, but I some how convince myself "in my mind" that I have actually done them?

Yes, A whole new level of forgetfulness (and I didn't think I could get any worse).

I forget birthdays. Usually I'll remember them eventually and send a belated card. But if I've convinced myself that I did send them....well, by the time the real Alzheimer's sets in I will be a lonely old woman, living with 100 cats, thinking I'm on the "Love Boat" waiting for my date with Captain Stubing, and I'll have no friends or family because they will all think I didn't love them enough to remember their birthdays.

Or how about appointments? I forget all varieties. But if I "think" I did take my kid to the doctor to get their shots and really didn't....they could get some weird disease and spread it to all the other kids in school and it will become a pandemic and I'll be like Bessie the cow, who kicked over the lantern and started the Chicago Fire and now that's the only thing she is remembered for but she probably had other good qualities.

One time I forgot two of my kids.

yes two.

It was Mac and Tony. They were little (4 and 2 I think) and we went to pick Bud and Nae up from school. We all got out of the car. Mac and Tony went to play on the playground. I was chit chatting with some other moms. Bud and Nae came out and we started talking about their day. We got in the car and continued talking and drove home.

I didn't realize I was missing two kids till we got home.

Yep, "Mother of the Year" I won it that year- you can look it up.

What if I "thought" I still had my kids with me or better yet my mind convinced itself that I only had two kids to begin with....it could happen.

So these are all the things I'm thinking about last night on the way to the game, during the game, and on the way home.

That and The Hubs should probably just put me away right now.

Then I got home and checked my e-mail. I did send it.

I guess all that worrying and "what ifs" were for nothing.

Except now you see how screwed up my thinking really is.

protecting the not so innocent

As you will see, I finally got around to changing the names of the kids and Hubby on my blog.

I've gone through most of my old posts and fixed them, but I'm sure I missed some here and there. I also edited pics and hometown stuff to try and keep it general.

Picking names was hard. I kept saying "that name doesn't fit" but then just decided -"well of course it doesn't!" and I just went ahead and did it.

I started out by taking a form of their middle names (per suggestion of one of my readers) but that got a little complicated and one was pretty insistent on what his name should be. One I used a nick name (you can try and figure it out it shouldn't be that difficult).

Hope it doesn't seem to weird for everyone. It sure does to me!

Let me formally introduce you to the "not so innocent" members of my family....

first there is "The Hubby" (I know SO creative!) or sometimes referred to as the "Hubs" or the "Dear Hubby". I realized when looking for a picture of him that I don't have many. So I chose this one. He is starting my cute little rototiller that he bought just for me to use in my garden many years ago. What could be more sexy...a man with a gardening tool! Oh yeah!

then there is "Nae". She is 21 and a senior in college.

here is "Bud". He is 18 and a senior in high school.

this is "Mac" she is 15 and a sophomore in high school.

And last, but not least, "Tony". He is 14 and an eighth grader.

Thanks for stopping by! Have a great day!

the Chicago shoe scene

While in the "Windy City" this past weekend, with my friends Lori and Pam, we got on the subject of my blog.

Of course, when you spend any amount of time with me(like longer than 2 seconds) I will end up talking about blogging.

Probably because I have no life.... and no job.... and no friends in my new city....

hmmm.

Anyways, thank goodness for dear, patient, loving friends like Lori and Pam who let me ramble about my cyber life and the people in it and the stuff we write about.

We were in a restaurant and we were people watching- which turned to outfit inspecting- which lead to shoe admiring. And wow! There are some amazing shoes running around Chicago at night (on ladies feet of course- not just running around by themselves cuz that would be scary if that happened- like a horror movie or something "Attack of the killer shoes that are running around without people in them" -it'd be scary, I'm sure. I'd go see it.).

Anywho, Pam or maybe it was Lori (I'm not sure) had the idea that I should pull out my camera and start taking pictures of all the cool shoes and write a blog about it.

I don't usually pay much attention to clothing or shoes (yeah-it's pretty pathetic) but I will admit that I was impressed with some of the shoes I saw. It actually made me want to go out shoe shopping. This is huge because shoe shopping is usually is right up there with getting a root canal in my "things I'd like to do" list.

But going up to random women and taking pictures of their shoes sounds just a little too creepy to me (even if I did claim to be blogging about it and even if I lied and said something like "I blog for the Chicago Tribune"--do they even have a blog?) I still don't think I would have had the nerve to do it.

We did spend some time "oooing and ahhing" over shoes (hey, another thing on my list of new things I've done in the city!) And the next day we even went shoe shopping and I didn't die or anything. Pam bought me something I never would have bought myself (and had to be talked into just a little "you're turning 40! every 40 y/o girl needs a pair of purple shoes") or something like that.

and while we were shopping we saw something a little like this.....

Taller-Black-PU-Boots-Thigh-High-Womens-Fashion.jpg

and we stood there looking at them and contemplating them. And then talked about how those would look on us.

and since so many teens are going around sporting the "muffin top" with their tight jeans, would it be acceptable to sport a "muffin top" with tight boots.

throw in some varicose veins...

I'll stop now.

it's not a pretty picture.

Happy Birthday to ME!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Last night I had a dream.

My body parts were all discussing who had it the toughest over these past 40 years.

My feet were the first to complain (they ALWAYS are)

and for some reason they sound like a little old Jewish man...

"Oi Vay! I'm dying here! Did you see those purple pointed things she crammed me into over the weekend? What a Yonkel!"

My back (who sounds a New York cabbie) interrupted

"Give me a ******* break!" (I'm always having to censor him)"You have no idea what real pain is! And what? you complain a little and she puts you up....babies you....rubs your sorry butt! What does she do to help me? Nada! that's what! She just keeps goin..."

Then my hands chime in "Darlings....(they sounds like Zsa Zsa Gabor)

soundoflife.net

no one works like me! I should be pampered! Manicures...expensive lotions...rings on every finger! But NO! I don't even get rubber gloves when she cleans! Everyone sees me and now *gasp*! Age spots! Makes me what to slap her!

My uterus tries to put in her two cents "ahem"....it's hard to tell what she even sounds like because everyone shouts in unison "Oh just shut up!" My uterus tends to be a little whiny and no one likes a whiner!

Then my brain (who sounds like....well, it sounds like Me! Duh!) "you guys need to simmer down! At least you guys get a break when she sleeps for 7 or 8 hours! I'm like the Energizer Bunny or Rodney Dangerfield or whoever! I never get a break! Look at me now! Even dreaming I have to keep the peace! And HELLO!?! How bout a little ADD medicine here? You think I like living like this? Geez...."

It went on and on all night long. My internal organs put in a few thoughts about exercise and eating healthier....but I ignored them.

Eventually my brain and I decided to just pretend I'm turning 29 today.....

figuring out the "L" in Chicago

Sometimes I feel like such an idiot.

I had my friends Pam and Lori here at the condo in Chicago for my birthday.

We were trying to decide what to do.

It can be so overwhelming. So many choices, so little time....

My goals when I'm in the city is always to learn and see something new.

As I've said before, I'm not very fond of shopping. I get pretty tired of visiting the same old restaurants and "touristy" places.

Lori heard of a festival being held in one of the northern suburbs of Chicago. They had food, drinks, a very eclectic assortments of bands playing for the day.

I thought this might be a great oportunity to try out the "L".

I've never riden the "L" before so I went on line to try and figure it out.
Is it just me or do they try and make public transportation stuff confusing?

The festival website that we looked at said "take the red line".

What "red line". I thought that's what they called one of lines on the bus system. I thought last time Pam and I got all lost in Chicago we ended up on the "blue line". How do you know when they are talking about the bus or the "L"?

And then the site talks about the subway (not the "L"). I specifically remember a conversation with my hubby (because he made fun of me) saying that Chicago doesn't have a subway.

Also, I thought the "L" only made a loop around a small area of the city, we need to go to a suburb that is up past Wrigleyville.

I am so confused.

So what do we do? We decided to walk down and see what we can find.

We'll call it an adventure....yeah, that's what we'll call it.

So we start walking, and talking, and walking, and talking, and pretty soon it seems like we have walked a long time. The website didn't make it look like that far.

I get out my map. And we look at it but it doesn't seem to help much.

We decide to keep walking with the thought that maybe we'll see something, eventually.

Then we see a store called "Marbles". Pam and Lori know that I love games so we decide to go in (since we are in no big hurry on our adventure). The guy that works there, named Ryan, is super nice, so I start asking him to explain the "L" to me.

He says that the "L" is the elevated train (which I knew) but that it has areas in the city where it goes underground (ahhh) and that it has an entrance just one block up. And it goes a lot farther north and south than I realized.

So we head out feeling a little more confident.

I don't know if this how it normally is but it seemed "under construction" to me. And look! A payphone! Pretty soon I think there will be a generation that doesn't know what those are.

looks like a subway to me.

smelled like one too and was really HOT!
We had some nice musical entertainment while we waited from 3 lovely men....and Pam joined in. Pam has a beautiful voice and they wanted to know where she sings professionally (She said the shower).

This was actually on the way home. On the way out there it was packed and we had to stand most of the ride (there was no way I could balance (the "L" is very jerky) take a pic and guard my purse with my life all at once).

At one point, Pam had a guy reach for the pole in front of her and get a little too cozy. She tried to ask him to move but I don't think he understood English. She handled it nicely and just grabbed his arm and moved it herself.

Have I told you Pam rocks?

Anywho. It was a nice evening. I think I'm comfortable enough now with the "L" to ride it anywhere.

I'd like to try "L roulette". Get on the "L" and ride it to different areas of the city and get off randomly to find places you've never seen before (of course you need to be careful and it would be best to do this during the day).

sorry it's blurry!

secret identity

The Hubby and I have been talking a lot about my blog lately.

He's a little concerned. He wants to be sure the kids and I are safe. I've monitoring who's reading my blog and also seeing how people are finding it.

And that can be a little....interesting to say the least.

We've decided that if I'm gonna keep doing this (who knows, I may run out of things to say or you may get sick of listening to me babble) that I need to be a little more careful.

So you will notice some changes over the next few days (I've already done some of them).
I will be removing as much personal info as I can.
I've also decided to take the kids names off.

I realize that some people (and maybe some creepy people) already know what city we live in and what my kids names are but if I get any new readers then they won't.

I've toyed around with the idea of what to call my kids.

Some other bloggers number theirs #1, #2, #3, #19 (nah--that's the Duggers and I'm sure she doesn't have time to blog).

Some come up with some pretty funny names.

I decided to ask Mac (thinking that she wouldn't want to and she'd say something like "It's your stupid blog, I don't care!).

Me: I'm thinking of making up some fake names for you guys for my blog. Would you be interested in helping me?

Mac: "Phhtt!" *{{rolling her eyes/making the "duhh! face"}}* "Uhhhh! Yeah! Of course!"
So we batted around some ideas for a while.

Mac thought that maybe we should go with a theme here's some examples...

I also asks some of my girlfriends to help out too (maybe you can figure out who picked what)

Nature Names~
Mac: Sunbeam (if that's the case then I get to change it to something else like "thunder cloud" on some days....)
Me: Bloom (yuck)
Hubby: Poke weed (heehee)
Tony: Tumble (the new pup would be "Ruff"---get it "ruff and tumble")
Bud: ?
Nae: River water


Native American Names~
Hubby: Man afraid of butterfly (we saw this one out west at a memorial-the kids loved it)
Me: Woman who stays away from cliffs and other high things cuz she's a really smart lady and knows that those people are crazy (yeah I'm might have to shorten it a little!)
Tony: Dances with dogs
Nae: Deep waters
Bud: Sleeper on rocks (he knows what I mean)

Meh! that's all we could come up with for now!
I'm off to see the city! (Chi Town)

Have a great weekend
and if you have any better ideas let me know!

blind coffee date

my moon flower is amazingly beautiful today!

I went out for coffee this morning.
It was a "blind coffee date" sort a thing.

Meeting new people after you move can be tough.
I will admit, I've been a little lonely.
But I'm not very good about going out and meeting new people.
I'm not one to go knock on the neighbors door and say "Hey! you wanna have coffee?"
Maybe I'm shy.

My daughter, Nae, who is a senior in college kinda set this up.
She knows someone, who knows someone, who just moved to our area around the same time that we did.
I'm not sure how it all came about they figured us ladies would "get along", so Nae texted me her e-mail address. "then you won't seem too much like a creeper mom" gee thanks!
I'm not real comfortable with this whole thing anyways but what the heck (plus Nae kept texting me everyday "did you email her yet?" so I had to do it).

So I met this lady this morning at a very cute coffee shop in our quaint little town. My realtor told me it was a "have to go to place".
She was right.
The almond croissants were to die for!
And the coffee was amazing too!
And the conversation was wonderful too!

Guess what? I made my first new friend since our move.

We both didn't have our cell phones (hers was dead and I left mine in the car) and we did notice a clock anywhere and we ended up talking for over 2 hours and it felt like 20 minutes.

I hoping we can get together next week.
It would be really nice if the hubbies got along too.

Well see!
Have a great weekend everyone!

calculator freak

Last night Tony told me he needed a calculator for school....by morning....I only had like a million other things to do....

imageenvision.com

So after I dropped him off at soccer practice I headed over to Office-Max or maybe it was Office-Depot.

Actually it was Office-Hades, yeah I'm pretty sure it was.

Tony wrote down on a piece of paper the type of calculator that he needed. He tried to just tell me, but the name of it contained numbers and I'm SO not good with numbers (if there's a number in it, I won't remember it- it's a curse).

I don't know why I have an issue when it comes to numbers. It's like my brain just says "Oh! there's a number! shutting down for now. don't really care so I'm not engaged. lalalala. Wake me up when you see something really interesting like a word." This seems to happen with any and all things that pertain to numbers. For example

*any kind of math-duh! (I don't remember any of my high school/ college math-if my kids need help then they go to dad)

*numbers on highways (living in Chicago helps their highways also have names like "The Eisenhower" and "The Ronald Reagan"-Nice!)

*phone numbers (not such a big deal with cells phone now a days except when you have to state your home phone number for someone and your mind goes blank)

*remembering birthdays....there's numbers in that too. (hey it's my learning handicap thingie and I'm sure that has something to do with me always missing people bdays!)

So I get to Office Hades and I can't find the calculators anywhere. Because I'm in a bit of a hurry I decide to ask one of the guys working there.

I'm thinking he will just point a finger and say something like "Isle 666" (it's Office Hades after all) but instead he lifts his chin and looks at the "imaginary something" over my right shoulder and asks "what kind are you looking for?"

Oh no. I know immediately this is not a good sign and that I won't be getting out of there anytime soon.

This man likes his calculators and there are two reasons why I know this.

1. Instead of directing me over to choose one myself, he just stands there and wants to talk about it first. I pull out my sheet of paper from Tony and read off "TI30X".

"Ahhh, good choice! (like I just selected a fine wine or something) would you be looking for an 'a' or 'II' ?" he asks. Then he pivots and begins to walk to where I 'm guessing they keep the calculators.

But I don't want to get ahead of myself. I need to tell you the second reason why I know he likes his calculators.

2. By the way he looked at the "imaginary something" over my shoulder while talking to me. As the mom of a math and science geek (Nae) who attended a special school filled with a bunch of other math and science geeks, you can spot that look a mile away. That is what I call "the almost corrected way of conversing with another human being" look.

See a lot of these kids who have gifts for numbers have a difficult time communicating with people. They spend a lot of time looking down when they talk to you. Us mom's at the school Nae went to used to have a joke "how can you spot an extrovert at the Math and Science Center?" "He looks at your shoes when he talks to you".

Many of these moms of geeks spent years nagging their kids (and I'm saying really pushing them) to look up when they are talking to someone. And so the next step in the geek rehab is when they look at the "imaginary something" over your shoulder, almost correct but not quite there.

As this guy is talking to me, the first thing I think is "ohhh... your mama was so close..." and then "Ughh! I'm never getting outta here quick."

We get over to the calculator isle and he immediately grabs one off the hook and starts jabbing at the numbers through the plastic covering. I answer his earlier question with "I'm pretty sure my son just wants the "a" model". So the guys starts telling me about all the different features on the calculator and all the "mathie" things that it can do. And guess what my brain starts doing? lalalalala..... and I'm thinking (or trying to mentally slap my brain) 'pay attention! Or at least pretend to pay attention and then grab the calculator and get out of there!'

Then he starts talking all this "math gibberish" about signs and co-signs and co-efficients and I'm just about to say "gesundheit!" and I'm smiling a little cuz my brain is going in about a thousand different directions and yeah what he's saying could sound a little like a sneeze. And then I realize he isn't talking anymore and that I totally tuned him out. He looks at me and pauses, like he's waiting for an answer to something. And I just smile and say "sorry, I don't really know what your talking about" and he rolls his eyes (did I mention that I'm guessing this guy is in his early 30's) and I'm thinking this guy is way to old to rolling his eyes at me. And then he says "it's the formula for the speed of sound" in this 'well-duhhhh' tone.

So then I'm thinking "lookie here you calculator freak I just want to buy a stinkin' calculator not take a math test!" but of course I don't say that. Instead I just smile and say "sorry" again. And Mr.-I-can't-look-you-in-the-eyes-when-I'm-talking-to-you says "well how about this one. (then he start speaking like he talking to a 5 year old deaf person who doesn't understand English very well) If you're driving 60 mph and you want to figure out how far you'd go in a minute..."he jabs at the plastic some more"you get one mile. You. get.that.don't.you...?"

"Yes I get that one. Thank you. Ok then. I'll take that one. Thanks." is what I said next instead of grabbing the nearest calculator and shoving it.....oh never mind.

I was pretty proud of myself. I may not know the formula for the speed of sound off the top of my head and I may suck at numbers but at least I know how to be polite. His mama needs to work on that with him when she working on teaching him to look someone in the eye when you talk to them.

how do I love thee? hold on honey, I'll blog about it...

*Warning*

To my kids: you may want to skip this post (I'm gonna talk mushy about dad, so just move on. I don't want to listen to you say teenager things to me later like "eewwww Mom! Now I'll have to go look at something really inappropriate just to get that image out of my head"--yes Mac said that to me once--don't worry she was kidding!)

So a little birdie told me (I'm not naming names- so don't even try asking) that I might pick on my husband too much in my blog.

As I've said before, he's a manly man, so I didn't worry too much about it.

It's all in good fun. Right?

I mean, if there's anything I can't stand it's stumbling on a blog and finding....

"Welcome to my perfect life!" *insert picture of pretty house here with beautiful gardens-not a speck of dust or a weed to be found anywhere-I dare you to look closely!*

"Here is my perfect husband!" *insert picture of stud muffin here with bulging muscles holding a perfect bouquet of flowers- so we can see how romantic his studliness is*

"Here are my perfect children!" *insert picture of 2.3 kids who are dressed in matching outfits and have big sweet doe eyes and they do everything their perfect mother asks without ever throwing a temper tantrum in Wal Mart*

"Here is the perfect meal I made last night, and it was a big hit!" *insert picture of food that no normal tot would touch*

"Here are all the handmade place cards I made for our Tuesday evening dinner to match all the handwoven table linens I made last night in between reading my sweet, angelic children bedtime stories, massaging my studly husbands massive muscles, and saving a kitten from a house fire next door" *insert picture of me vomiting*

Sorry, I hope I didn't offend anyone, but that's just not me.

Nothing in my life is perfect and I have a hard time believing there is anyone out there that has a real life like that.

In fact, I think it probably discourages a lot more women than it encourages.

Don't get me wrong, I like to look at pretty things and the creative things some women do. It's just when it's all just "too perfect".

My blog isn't about the perfect husband or kids or house.

But I need something to blog about.

So I tend to poke fun at my family a little. I was hoping that maybe we could all sympathize together, maybe laugh at ourselves. I would never intentionally hurt someones feelings...I definitely don't want to give anyone the idea that my hubby is a jerk or anything. He's not.

Now, just to set the record straight now I'm gonna tell you what a great guy my hubby is. (you can click this window shut now if you're like me and don't want to read a bunch of mushy stuff--I'll see ya tomorrow--I'll make some more fun of my dear family then).

Ok then, how to begin? A list, yeah lists are easy (since this seems to be harder than I thought. Maybe I don't compliment my hubby enough. I'm really not purposefully putting this off. I'm just rambling, sometimes I do that)

Reasons why I think my husband is a great guy
(this list is in no order of importance or at all inclusive-just so ya know).

1. He's hot. Yeah, after 19 yrs of marriage he still makes my heart go pitter-patter and my knee go weak (especially when he's holding a power tool!)

TMI?

2. He's a really good dad (that's part of the reason I married him. When I saw how he took care of Nae when I was a single mom, I melted)

No mullet jokes please

3. He's the "yang" to my "yin" or "we work well together" or we complement each other. He makes up for my "quirky personality traits". I like to think I do the same for his. You get my meaning.

4. He's a great provider for our family. He works hard and gives his best to everything he does.

5. He a handy man extraordinaire. He can fix anything or build anything. I find that extremely sexy.

6. He goes out of his way to spend time with me. He plans trips for just the two of us and arranges the childcare and everything.

7. He loves the Lord

I don't know why I choose this pic. (any excuse to show the tat?) it's a cross that's why

8. He always comes up with fun things to do with the kids one on one. Something that he knows they will love.

Well, I hope that sets the record straight. As I always say, I could go on but I won't.

puppy love

Move over dear Hubby

Get out of the way kids

My heart has been stolen

and I haven't even seen him in person yet

but he's ours.

we won't get him for another 3 weeks

He's a border collie

I'm sure I'll have better pictures later (these were taken with Hubby's cell phone)

any name suggestions?