Happy Birthday to ME!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

Last night I had a dream.

My body parts were all discussing who had it the toughest over these past 40 years.

My feet were the first to complain (they ALWAYS are)

and for some reason they sound like a little old Jewish man...

"Oi Vay! I'm dying here! Did you see those purple pointed things she crammed me into over the weekend? What a Yonkel!"

My back (who sounds a New York cabbie) interrupted

"Give me a ******* break!" (I'm always having to censor him)"You have no idea what real pain is! And what? you complain a little and she puts you up....babies you....rubs your sorry butt! What does she do to help me? Nada! that's what! She just keeps goin..."

Then my hands chime in "Darlings....(they sounds like Zsa Zsa Gabor)

soundoflife.net

no one works like me! I should be pampered! Manicures...expensive lotions...rings on every finger! But NO! I don't even get rubber gloves when she cleans! Everyone sees me and now *gasp*! Age spots! Makes me what to slap her!

My uterus tries to put in her two cents "ahem"....it's hard to tell what she even sounds like because everyone shouts in unison "Oh just shut up!" My uterus tends to be a little whiny and no one likes a whiner!

Then my brain (who sounds like....well, it sounds like Me! Duh!) "you guys need to simmer down! At least you guys get a break when she sleeps for 7 or 8 hours! I'm like the Energizer Bunny or Rodney Dangerfield or whoever! I never get a break! Look at me now! Even dreaming I have to keep the peace! And HELLO!?! How bout a little ADD medicine here? You think I like living like this? Geez...."

It went on and on all night long. My internal organs put in a few thoughts about exercise and eating healthier....but I ignored them.

Eventually my brain and I decided to just pretend I'm turning 29 today.....