it's a tough job, butt somone's gotta do it

The twins that I babysit showed up in these little outfits yesterday.

I thought "how cute" and they kinda remind me of something

not sure what it is...

but then as the day wore on I noticed a problem that seemed to go along with these outfits.



Do you see it?

how about now?

(sorry, that's a little too obvious)

Yes, for some reason these outfit caused a battle of the crack.

One that I ended up fighting all day long.

I don't remember having to yank up baby britches over and over ever before.

Butt...that's what I did all day yesterday.

I think I forgot how to take care of babies

I'm watching the twins again today for the first time in over a month.

I'm not sure why but I feel like I'm all thumbs today.

Fumbling like I haven't cared for a baby in 20 years....

Brogan began our day with lots of crying and a colossal-five-wipe-alert messy diaper.

He seemed really mad that it took me so long (like 2 seconds after he started screaming) to figure out he needed changing (hey! I was busy smooching those big chubby baby cheeks....give me a break!). By the time I got out the changing pad, wipes and clean diaper he was furious.

That resulted in him arching his back and kicking and screaming through the entire diaper change.

Due to my five-thumbs-today-handicap I ended up getting "it" all over the place.

I thought I saw a little diaper rash (maybe this is why he's so mad?) so I decided that he needed a little Desitin.

I kinda forgot, a little of that stuff goes a long way and with all the kicking and squirming, the thick white goo ended up on his legs, his chest, in between my fingers and under my nails. I tried wiping it off but that just spread it around. I tried just rubbing my hands together....it doesn't rub in. I think I see some in my hair now.

I had to lay him down to make his bottle which made him even happier and caused Marcus to join in the screaming. The can of powdered formula was bran new and I went to pop the top and it broke off. I had a moment of panic and images flashing in my mind of failing to pry it open, sliced fingers and blood squirting everywhere, screaming hungry babies and a humbling to call Brian and Amber. But the can opener worked just fine on it and all is well.

Of course, they both wanted to eat at the same time so I had my first experience of propping babies, balancing bottles, and tandem burping.

Just as we were finishing up the last few ounces and I swear I hear water running. I have not started any laundry today (I know that when I can actually accomplish something other than childcare on these days...I will be a well adjusted twin babysitter!)

In the past our washing machine hose has broke off and flooded the house and that is the first thing that I think of.

I gather both babies in my arms and run upstairs to check to see if it's the hose or maybe a pipe has burst (been through that too).

The noise seems to disappear upstairs. So we go back to the living room.

I hear it again.

We take a trip to the basement.

Gone again.

Back in the living room I realize it's this stupid thing....

Back in my baby rearing days we didn't have all these fancy noise making motion simulator thingies.

Doesn't he kinda look like Archie Bunker in his old chair?



It was a long day for Ace.
He needs his nap time to be uninterrupted.

I think at one point he purposefully barked to wake the boys up just for pay backs,
and of course I loved every minute of the day....

for Amber and Brian

Life was going along rather smoothly at my new home,

I've almost got MY person trained.
Life revolved around me (as it should). MY person feeds me, plays with me, collects my poo (she seems to really like my poo-she grabs it every time I go! I know weird ehh?)

Then this morning....

then these strange things showed up at MY house.

for a while it wasn't so bad.

These things just made a few weird noises.

little squeaks and grunts

I decided to keep guard....

you never know what might be in those things.

then one of them made a horrible racket!

so I did what needed to be done.

I switched sides.

I'll guard the quiet one.

But then the one making all the noise stopped and the other one started!

and it got a little crazy.

and MY person pulled THIS thing out.

I'm not sure what is but it sure smells funny.

especially this end...

I guess this end isn't so bad, although MY person won't let me close for long enough to get a good smell and lick.

Then there was more noise from those things again....

and MY person pulled another one out (gosh! I hope there not anymore in there!)

and then the first one fell asleep on the chair

MY chair!

The one that I'm not even allowed to sit in!

so I show her!

of course she kicked me out!

unbelievable!

and they both started making a ruckus!

and MY silly person got into this contraption

I began to get a little annoyed.

How is she going to throw MY ball?

How is she going to pick ME up and carry ME?

So the best thing for me to do is remind her whose in charge here.

so I rang my "go outside bell" and waited.

I'll let her pick up some poo. Then she'll know who's #1!