Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Hanging Christmas lights and other dangerous life risking activities

Mac and I tried to hang the Christmas lights in the tree in front of our house the other day.
Yes "tried"....
I know, I know, I'm not sure why I even thought I could do this. I've told you about my fear of heights, but I had to go and do something.

Hubby was working on our kitchen project, tiling the back splash.
Who knew the builders of our house could hang cupboards so crooked (or maybe the floors are sloped.... so then the counters are off...I don't know)

Anyhoo, the tiles were not "lining up" or whatever and I was trying to offer my "I've-never-done-this-before-so-I-have-no-idea-what-I'm-talking-about" opinion.

Hubby really wasn't in the mood to listen.

It was obvious that it would be best if I just leave the house. I thought I'd try and do something nice for Hubby since he was working so hard.

I got the ladder out and all the lights and Mac wasn't doing anything so she said she'd help.
Actually, I think it was just an excuse for her to make fun of me.

I will admit I was kinda of whimpering when I got up on that ladder.
Not on purpose of course.
Mac said if I was going to "cry like a baby" then she would just do it.

I'm not sure if I've said it before, but the only thing scarier than being up high is watching one of your kids up high.
As soon as she got up there my only thought was "she gonna fall and die!" well, that and my first quick fleeting thought: "hey my butt used to look like that".

As I held the ladder, I closed my eyes but then I realized if she fell I wouldn't be able to catch her.
So, I had to force myself to open them and watch. And the whimpering started again and then I started shaking (remember this is all completely uncontrollable). And I worried if I shook too hard I would knock her off the ladder myself.

Unfortunately, the neighbors were outside hanging their Christmas lights too. And I can only imagine what they thought of their new neighbors.

Me: whimpering.
Mac: "Come on Mom! Suck it up! You're fine!".
Me: "This isn't....*shudder*.....a good...*choke*....idea"
Mac: "Oh my gosh Mom! you know you wouldn't have this problem if you weren't such a conformist!"

She's referring to the fact that all our neighbors put light on the trees out in front of their houses that line the street. All the same way, all the same color, all the way through our neighborhood. A fact that we were informed about during our first neighborhood block party in July....

yeah, I know, give me a cliff...

I'll jump if you do.

Back to the scene out front. As Mac goes on about her conformist spiel, I glace over at my neighbor to the right, who I know is hearing this whole conversation. He gives me this apologetic smile and shrug of the shoulders.

His tree died last summer so he planted a new one. He can reach the top without a ladder.

Mac hollers over to him "Hey! how come you have such a small tree?"

He tells her how his tree died.

Mac: "Why can't we just kill our tree like he did? Then we won't have to worry about your crazy fear of heights" she says this loud enough that my embarrassment is beginning to obscure my urge to cry. She is now standing on the second to top rung of the ladder while reaching over to drape the lights on a limb.

I feel like I'm gonna throw up now.

I tell her she has to get down. Mac continues to rant about my silly fears and on and on.

Later Hubby and Bud came out and hung the lights with this little telescoping hookie thingie.

Who knew we had one of those.

Here's my new glass tile back splash


Travis said...


I didn't know a fear of heights existed that was greater than my own.

What a pantywaist.


Mac sounds like a wicked cool kid!

Theta Mom said...

Love the backsplash! BTW, since my move to WP, my feeds still haven't updated, so hope I didn't lose you!

Barb said...

I didn't have a telescoping hookie thingy, but I asked my 7 year old to find me a big stick. My boys always have a stash of sticks! It worked great, but I still had to get on the ladder. Love the backsplash. Neither my hubby nor I are talented enough to do that! It looks great.

Kimi@SoManyKidsSoLittleTime said...

Love the new backsplash! I am not hanging any outside lights this year. That's right. I'm a rebel.

blueviolet said...

I envy my daughter's butt too. So perky, small and lifted. Dang it all.

Tell the truth. Driving through your neighborhood and looking at the lights is utterly boring, isn't it? ;)

Your back splash is sublime!

Anti-Supermom said...

First, the tile is gorgeous!

I just learned about that little thingy for hanging lights myself, maybe we will finally join the rest of the houses on the block and light it.

I'm a non-conformist like that :)

rxBambi said...

the backsplash looks great!

if I want anything done up high I have to do it myself cuz hubby is afraid of heights. I make him stand under the ladder and point in which direction I want to land should I happen to fall...

LivingInspired said...

They really all do the same light schematic on the trees? I bet your street looks amazing! Bummer about the telescopic thing, at least you tried and now know you have one!

Mrs. Sarcasm said...

Love the backsplash!!! Can I be adopted into your family?! Please, that is all I want for Christmas! Please right a book about parenting. I will buy all the copies in my town...I promise! I loved the comment about your butt looking like that once!!! Too funny!

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