the unwanted theater experience

http://myhaven.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/movie-theater.jpg

I finally broke down and went to see Avatar last weekend with my friend Gigi.
We decided to splurge and go to the IMAX.

I figured by now there wouldn't be too many people in the theater.
Boy, was I wrong!

Gigi and I got there early and listened to one of the guys who worked at the theater talk about the best place to sit in order to get the "best IMAX experience".

We picked our seats and all was well.
Then the theater started to fill....and fill....and fill.

Just as the theater lights were dimming a man and his wife scooted in front of us sat down next to me.

And I immediately noticed a horrible smell.

It was a combination of strong cigarette smoke and really horrible body odor. I thought to myself, "It will be okay. I can take it". That thought lasted about 30 seconds before I realized I couldn't do it.

So I scanned the theater to look for a new seat. It was packed. There were no seats anywhere.

I decided to try and put on some of my Bath and Body Works lotion to try and alleviate the stench. I nonchalantly applied it under my nose and around my mouth. It didn't helped much.

Then he started to cough a smokers cough of a magnitude that affirmed his habit. I'd estimate about 3 1/2 packs a day hacking.

Yeah. all with out covering his mouth.

Luckily, he only did this a few times but then there was the constant wheezing that accompanied each breath. By the time the previews were over, I had diagnosed him with emphysema.

I was praying under my breath that the movie would be really loud, otherwise I would never get my ADD mind to focus with all these other sensory distractions going on.

I'm pretty sure I sound intolerant, I don't mean to be.
Maybe it because of my ADD mind and having a hard time with distractions but this explains why I don't go to movies very often. I hate paying for the "theater experience" ($14/ticket) and getting more "theater experience" than I want.

You know,
~cell phones ringing, or the light of cell phones flashing while people text (which btw, according to some teens I've talked to recently, is perfectly acceptable to do in theaters because "it's not ringing!")
~people talking through the whole movie
~babies crying (never could figure out why people do that-bring a baby to a movie)
~people kicking you in the head when they rest their feet on your seat
~and now something I had never thought of before or experienced--hacking smelly wheezy people sitting right next to me coughing on me. YUCK!

I did finally get absorbed enough in the movie to forget the guy next to me but it took awhile. I'm going to say that it was worth it this time.
There are some movies you just have to see on the big screen.